Table Talk

I went to a meeting the other night and left convicted yet encouraged.  A mom of five was talking to us about the table.  Not necessarily whats on your table (but she did cover that briefly ) but more the atmosphere that surrounds your family dinner table.  Do your children display good manners?  Are they saying how yucky the dinner is?  Are they sitting in their seats?  Are they able to carry on a decent conversation at the table?  I noticed as she started her talk that I was patting myself on the back as she began with "Are your children saying words like "yuck" or "gross" at the table.  That is a pet peeve of Jeff's so that doesn't happen too much at our table.  I also patted myself on the back when she said can your kids carry on a decent conversation at the table?  Man can my kids talk.  There is no end to the conversation at our table.  And her question of "Do you eat together every night?" Yup been doing that since they were born so yeah for me... Pat, Pat, PAT. 
Next came the conviction and deflating though.  She said "I can tell from the looks on some of your faces that you are doing a typical "Homeschool Mom" pat on the back, before you pat your back so hard it goes out of alignment let me ask you this.  Do your kids sit in their seats through dinner?" 
Ah, crap!  No, I have one that bounces around so much I have pretty much just taken away his chair and he stands at the table.  And as she continued to talk I was convicted of how I am enabling him to fail.  Will he be expected to sit at a dinner meeting for work? Will he be expected to sit at a restaurant?  Will he be expected to sit at work?  YES he will.  I let him stand for school (which I think at his stage is perfectly fine, why else homeschool if you can't help your kids where they need it most, fidget control) but I don't make him sit for dinner as I just don't want to deal with the issue.  That is not a good reason.  I'm sure if I had another reason other than my own laziness then things would be different but there not. Another area of conviction came when she spoke of what happens in your home while you prepare for a dinner with guests.  Are your kids comfortable enough to help?Are you agitated all day while preparing for guests? Do you allow them to help? I struggle with this area so much!  I have let the perfectionist in me overtake my kitchen.  I don't let my kids help me because if I let one then they all want to help and its just too hard to watch three kids in the kitchen when you have a deadline. (and you want everything to be perfect) and yes I get super frustrated and crabby. She then asked us "Did your guests come for a 5 star meal, or did they come for your company, encouragement and friendship?"  OUCH!  I loved the idea she gave to have one kid a day be designated as the MOMMY HELPER.  You have one on one help to teach the child what you have been wanting too teach them but your perfectionism has hindered. 
I loved her talk so much that I bought her book.  I have really enjoyed the lighthearted tips and recipes she has given in her book.  Its not very long but just an encouragement to be the example that God has given to plan ahead, invite and encourage your guests that come into your home.  (Prov. 9:1-6)  The book is called Time Around the Table  by Michele Helms. 
So today we've implemented Mommy's Helper and had a blast.  We are hoping that soon we'll have guests to be able to encourage at our dinner table.  :)