Motivation

I have found that lately I'm lacking a very important key component to my daily duties.  MOTIVATION.  I don't want to do my chores around the house, I don't want to teach school, I don't want to make dinner.... I just want to stay in bed all day!  HMMMM my brain says there is a problem with that logic.  

The definition according to Webster's dictionary is: the condition of being eager to act or work. 

I can't remember the last time I was eager to do anything.  So this has caused me to think.  What is my problem? Why am I unmotivated?  I came to one and only one conclusion. 

SATAN.  

God has been speaking to me for over a year about my role as a mom, a mother and a teacher.  These three seemingly simple things are the key to my service of God, my children's well being, my marriage and a happy home. He has now placed me in a situation where those are all I have... Why am I unmotivated?  Why am I asking why?  It seems very clear to me today that SATAN doesn't want me to be happy here in Georgia.  God must have something so awesome instore for us and I need to get on board.  

My prayer right now is that I see the blessings God has placed in my life today.  I have an awesomely big house that is situated near every major business that I need, yet secluded enough that all I hear in the mornings is the wind in the trees and the birds chirping.  I do not have the distractions of friends and family to keep me from staying home and doing what is necessary.  What better place is there for me right at this moment?  He is stretching me to get outside my comfort zone and meet new people and serve my family first.  I want to seize that blessing before it is gone and I have missed a blessed time in my families life.      

Sad Heart

So today I have a very sad heavy heart.  My best friend has been here for a week visiting.  It has been a wonderful blessed time.  We have chatted, laughed, cried and just had a great time with one another's company.  We have not needed to go site seeing or do grand things.  Just being in one another's company was good.  We went shopping, took each other to lunch and sat on the couch watching chick flicks while the kids slept or played outside.  Today she leaves.  I am struggling with feelings of loss, loneliness and fear.  

I know that I need to trust the Lord with these feelings.  I know that I will be okay.  I know that God has something for me here.  Why else would He have brought me.  However, I also know that so far after 80 some odd days here I have yet to find a friend that I can even call and say hey, much less someone who I can confide in and feel comfortable with.  

I know she is only a phone call away but there is definitely something to be said for being able to meet someone in person. 

I am going to miss her dearly. 

Charlie Horses

So this week I have been experiencing something I haven't experienced since grade school.  I have had charlie horses. OUCH.  I forgot how painful they were.  Tuesday I had just a small one in my calf.  No biggie.  Then as the week continued they became more frequent and painful.  I had one in my thigh which made me think that I was going to collapse on the floor.  

So today when I went to see my NAET doctor I explained to her my issue.  She laughed and said that is good.  I did not see the humor in this.  If it was good that implies that there will be more.  I don't want more.  She said that it actually meant my body was accepting the treatment for my thyroid and therefore my metabolism is starting to rev up (if you will).  That is good news!

But will I have to deal with charlie horses from now on?  Good news, NO.  She said that I needed one of two minerals and that was easily fixable. I could implement them via foods rich in them or I could take them orally.  Wow, that's easy!

I am so excited that I am getting better, I am so excited that there is evidence of getting better.  I'm an instant gratification person so to see results quickly is a good thing. 

Table Talk

I went to a meeting the other night and left convicted yet encouraged.  A mom of five was talking to us about the table.  Not necessarily whats on your table (but she did cover that briefly ) but more the atmosphere that surrounds your family dinner table.  Do your children display good manners?  Are they saying how yucky the dinner is?  Are they sitting in their seats?  Are they able to carry on a decent conversation at the table?  I noticed as she started her talk that I was patting myself on the back as she began with "Are your children saying words like "yuck" or "gross" at the table.  That is a pet peeve of Jeff's so that doesn't happen too much at our table.  I also patted myself on the back when she said can your kids carry on a decent conversation at the table?  Man can my kids talk.  There is no end to the conversation at our table.  And her question of "Do you eat together every night?" Yup been doing that since they were born so yeah for me... Pat, Pat, PAT. 
Next came the conviction and deflating though.  She said "I can tell from the looks on some of your faces that you are doing a typical "Homeschool Mom" pat on the back, before you pat your back so hard it goes out of alignment let me ask you this.  Do your kids sit in their seats through dinner?" 
Ah, crap!  No, I have one that bounces around so much I have pretty much just taken away his chair and he stands at the table.  And as she continued to talk I was convicted of how I am enabling him to fail.  Will he be expected to sit at a dinner meeting for work? Will he be expected to sit at a restaurant?  Will he be expected to sit at work?  YES he will.  I let him stand for school (which I think at his stage is perfectly fine, why else homeschool if you can't help your kids where they need it most, fidget control) but I don't make him sit for dinner as I just don't want to deal with the issue.  That is not a good reason.  I'm sure if I had another reason other than my own laziness then things would be different but there not. Another area of conviction came when she spoke of what happens in your home while you prepare for a dinner with guests.  Are your kids comfortable enough to help?Are you agitated all day while preparing for guests? Do you allow them to help? I struggle with this area so much!  I have let the perfectionist in me overtake my kitchen.  I don't let my kids help me because if I let one then they all want to help and its just too hard to watch three kids in the kitchen when you have a deadline. (and you want everything to be perfect) and yes I get super frustrated and crabby. She then asked us "Did your guests come for a 5 star meal, or did they come for your company, encouragement and friendship?"  OUCH!  I loved the idea she gave to have one kid a day be designated as the MOMMY HELPER.  You have one on one help to teach the child what you have been wanting too teach them but your perfectionism has hindered. 
I loved her talk so much that I bought her book.  I have really enjoyed the lighthearted tips and recipes she has given in her book.  Its not very long but just an encouragement to be the example that God has given to plan ahead, invite and encourage your guests that come into your home.  (Prov. 9:1-6)  The book is called Time Around the Table  by Michele Helms. 
So today we've implemented Mommy's Helper and had a blast.  We are hoping that soon we'll have guests to be able to encourage at our dinner table.  :)

Baby its cold outside!

As a kid I longed to live somewhere that had seasons.  Growing up in AZ you get Summer and Spring.  And Spring is very short lived.  I was so excited when I was able to go to college in MO where I could watch the leaves turn gold, auburn, peach and every shade between.  Then I actually got to experience leaves falling off the trees!  What a beautiful time of year.  My first Thanksgiving in MO was beautiful.  The first ice storm I had ever experienced happened to be the worst MO had seen in 20 years.  The trees turned to a beautiful crystal shimmer.  It was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen.  Driving from St. Louis to Springfield, MO I was in absolute awe over the crystal reflections of trees everywhere.  Then after winter came Spring, little green shoots popping up out of the ground, gorgeous pink, green, yellow, blue and purple popping up everywhere you looked.  So much better than the brown, olive, tan and brown that was always available in AZ.  As Spring turned to Summer the greens and various colors of Spring turned more vibrant and strong.  Summer then turned to Fall and the cycle would go again.  I thought this was awesome.  I loved experiencing every aspect of 4 seasons.  

Today, living in GA I am once again finding myself missing things like snow, ice and the like.  It is 34 degrees outside but there is not a single flake falling.  We have had drizzle that burns at it touches your skin because it is that cold.  So even though it is 45 outside you can't play outside as the drizzle is just painful.  The ground is wet. My theory is that if it is going to be cold you need to have cold weather type precipitation ie: snow or even ice.  Yes, I said ice at least then it would justify (in my mind anyway) the cold temperatures.  

Since I can not change where I am living.  I will make the best of what I have.  The three oldest kids and I are bundled up on the couch watching School House Rock, learning about adjectives, nouns, gravity and multiplication tables and oh yeah a bill too!